Friday, July 16, 2010

Apparently I need to learn more about Udders

Last spring - the Kindergartners went on a field trip to a Farm. The day of the trip Mr. Z and I were waiting for the bus when.....

Me: Hey Z, are you excited to go to the farm?
Mr. Z: Yes - I am super excited. I have lots of questions for the farmers.
Me: Really? Like what.
Mr. Z: I have lots of questions about udders.
Me: What? Like on a cow? What questions about udders do you have?
Mr.Z: I want to know how come cows have so many tits.
Me: You mean TEATS? They are called TEATS, not tits....
Mr.Z: Oh. Well I am going to ask the farmers about those udders and ti...teats.

(the bus arrives and Mr. Z quickly hugs me and hastens towards the open door)

Me: (yelling) Remember...they are TEATS, like TREATS. Think about TREATS before you ask any questions. TREEEEATS!

I would be embarrassed but how else is the kid going to learn about TEATS? Certainly not by ignoring burning udder questions like the majority of the suburban population.

So the next time you are visiting a farm - try to expand your grasp of essential bovine trivia by asking the farmer about female cow parts.

Remember - there are no stupid questions. Just stupid Mom's (who lack basic udder knowledge) waiting anxiously at home to find out if their offspring will be kicked out of kindergarten for sporting an inappropriate vocabulary.


Marci said...

That is so funny! I miss you my dear friend!

Candice Carter said...

Your stories always make me laugh out loud!!!

Anonymous said...

You make me laugh. I think we just talked about teats and tits recently too. Now explain that movie Barn Yard to me. Why do the male cows have utters, huhh? I loved the previous post about abandoning your children. I'm glad I'm not the only absent minded parent around;)