Wednesday, January 16, 2008
So thanks to Jamie Lynn Spears' incredibly publicized teen pregnancy, and the ensuing playground gossip of her tabooed behavior I had to have 'the talk' with N. Ugh. After finishing up with the basics, he had only one question: "So when I'm all big and hairy down there - that's when I have to do it?"
The next night however, after processing the information, he had a few personal insights:
"You said it was a way married people show they love each other. I think it is the way married people show each other how disgusting they are."
"Is that thing disgusting and violent, or just disgusting?"
"If I got shot while I was doing that thing would it be violent then?"
"When Dad was disgusting it's too bad he didn't pick my egg first - then I would be the oldest."
"What house did you and Dad live in when you did that disgusting thing that made me?"
"Do I do it at my party when I get married - oh wait - I better not do it at the party - I don't want people to know that I am disgusting."
I was in physical pain - trying to control the hysterical laughter that threatened to erupt with each comment or question. Needless, to say, my feeling that he was not mature enough to handle the facts of life was dead on. If not for some choice information being shared during recess I could have put it off for a while. D@#% that Jamie Lynn Spears.